I grew up with science fiction books and movies. Cybernetics and robotics entertain me and fascinate me. Watching my own arm spasm and convulse mechanically under painful-yet-relieving electric pulses, I begin to question my humanity.

Androids are  neither living nor dead. Far from human, but far from anything else. Designed and constructed, coded to only serve a particular purpose. Under that fleshy skin, there is nothing but metal and oil. No heart, nor lungs to break. No weak bone to crumble. Yet things to rust and things to degrade in parallel.

Under millions of lines of aging, glitchy and incomprehensibly complex code, there is something human there. Something carrying on the life and legacy of a person who died years ago.

A leg creaks with years of built up rust, and I in turn, merely grumble.

Having mentioned my issues with students and drinking prior to this post, I shall spare reiterating my somewhat vitriolic view on the world of student night-life, and instead just talk about another of my favourite places to relax and have a drink with some of my close friends.

VOX is a reasonably-sized bar, hidden away in the back streets of Huddersfield’s myriad of winding and twisting paths. The bar has a very unique feeling about it, in its stone walls, framed band posters, and comfortable leather seats. It has an almost speakeasy vibe about it, being for intimate conversation, or relaxing in the daylight hours. It has a downstairs bar as well as upstairs, in the event of a busy night or overflow.

But this is not what I love most about VOX. I do enjoy its relaxed atmosphere, and its retro music, but most of all? They have the biggest range of fruit beers in one space I’ve ever seen. Those of you who know me know I’m crazy about fruit beers, and I will call any bar that has an ample supply of them “home”.

I’ve not been there much this term, due to it being a recent discovery, but I have enjoyed every evening spent there. They also have a fantastic range of delicious (and painfully expensive) cocktails. A friend and I are working our way through the entire menu, though I avoid anything with gin in, the vile, treacherous concoction that it is.

This review probably wouldn’t be written by me if it didn’t include at least once bizarre point of interest, and in that, I shall direct your attention to the toilets. The bathrooms in VOX, at least the women’s, contain some rather amusing graffiti. Amongst all the common “FUK UR MUM” witticisms and “JENNY 4 ANDY” drivel, there’s a significant amount of humorous rhyming or, dare I say, moving creeds and beliefs. I guess everybody has their occasional toilet epiphanies.

Either way, much like Peacock Lounge, should you find yourself in Huddersfield on any day, and needing a drink, do go to VOX. It’s quite delightful.

As a student, it might be expected that I spend a great amount of my time in pubs and clubs, getting drunk off my face on shots of expensive liquors that barely touch my tastebuds before they are washed away with a contrastingly cheap beer or lager. It may also be expected that I start fights for no reason, and am found throwing up in a gutter at 4am after aforementioned clubs are shut.

This, thankfully, is not that case for myself. I detest crowds, and I equally detest the drunken students you would find within such crowds. Still, I cannot deny that Huddersfield is a student town, and while it is saturated with clubs peddling bottles of VK for a mere 99p, I seek locations far removed from the idiotic crowds and ear-splitting static cacophony referred to as “music” in this day and age.

Did I mention this was a classy joint?

This is where Peacock Lounge comes in, Huddersfield’s one and only vaudeville club. They hold an array of events and entertainment, as the “vaudeville” part suggests. Everything from local, talented comedians to the risqué burlesque and cabaret. They also serve as a small venue for bands or solo music performances. For those who know what it is, they are also Huddersfield’s home of Dr. Sketchy’s Anti-Art School, which uses burlesque dancers, fetish artists and sideshow performers as life models.

Peacock Lounge is very small, with room for ~60 people. Decorated lavishly, I always feel like dressing up just the smallest amount whenever I go. I am a regular patron of the monthly Whiskey on the Shelf gigs, which are strictly for rockabilly and retro 50s Rock ‘n Roll. Being the music that I grew up with, I always enjoy myself at these shows, and am found spending the night nursing a couple of glasses of bourbon.

If alcohol is indeed your thing, and if money is burning a hole in your pocket, then PL offers a wide range of fine wines, beers, spirits, and snacks to soak up the alcohol if it starts getting a little too much. They have a wonderful range of whiskeys, bourbons, brandies and cognacs, and the staff tend to be a bit generous with their measures and go easy on the ice, if ice is your thing. I’m fairly sure some people out there would call me out as a heretic for sullying my drinks with ice.

The staff are cheerful and friendly, in addition to being quite quirky and eccentric in their individual ways, but they are very lovable, and always comment or compliment on your drink of choice. Due to the small amount of people who attend, regulars are easy to spot, and they will always recognise your face a second time around.

Whatever event you go to, Peacock Lounge is probably one of my favourite locations and venues in Huddersfield, with great bands playing every third Friday of the month at Whiskey on the Shelf, as well as other brilliant music gigs every Friday in between that. Or perhaps if you feel like a bit of the aforementioned risqué entertainment, prepare to pre-book, as those tickets fly out fast.

There’s not much more I can really say, beyond that it’s a 100% guarantee that unless the band members are younger, that I will be the youngest person in there by at the very least a decade, at 20 years old. This isn’t your average student watering hole by any stretch of the imagination.